The Handel Method’s® answer to the incessant voice of the brain-brat (you know, that little voice in your head that says “I don’t wanna, I deserve, I shouldn’t have to?”) is a principle called “Being Done.” And guess what? We’ve all employed this method unconsciously at one time or another when we finally “had it up to here” (or said another way, the consequences became too severe).
But, did you know you can employ “Being Done” anytime- and at will? Let’s recall the times you already have.
- Think of the lover you were finally “done with.”
- Think of the bad habit you quit: biting your nails, smoking, pulling all-nighters, over-drinking, faking orgasms, being underpaid, etc.
- Think of the time you finally: asked for the raise, quit the job, said what you wanted in bed, started exercising or doing yoga regularly, once and for all.
These were the times you put your stake in the ground. You did it; you resolved to change and you did.
My theory is that you can get to this place of “Being Done” anytime and frequently. And if you do, you will lead an exciting life, indeed. Life lived in this vein feels limitless because you decide what you will tolerate feeling, thinking and choosing to do. you have the ability to control your mind, heart and body and so by practicing this control you will find the greatest happiness. And I recommend you don’t consider the work of “Being Done” to be “hard.”
Here are five easy steps:
1) Recall and delight in examples of “Being Done” in the past.
2) State clearly what you are newly “Done” with, like: I will never smoke again, I no longer overeat, I no longer eat red meat, I no longer skip meals/sleep, etc.
3) Tell as many people as possible. Be specific and un-vague.
4) Prepare your trigger list. What could happen to make you want to go right back to the old habit and what will you do to prevent that from happening? Tell everyone that, too.
5) Set up your new rules, consequences and accountability structure. (A coach is perfect for this.)
If any of this sounds weird to you, ask your coach. Or join me on a teleseminar I am leading called “Debunking Your Dumbass Theories” on September 28th from 12-1pm and I’ll explain how to silence the brain-brat forever and be done.